How to Piss In Public: FIDLAR - "Cocaine" (Nick Offerman's "swan, son")

It's pretty damn awesome and utterly ridiculous that a respected online news magazine like The Hollywood Reporter seriously tried to interview FIDLAR bassist Brandon Schwartzel about Nick Offerman's dick! FIDLAR recorded a righteous Skate Punk-infused cover of traditional standard "Cocaine [Blues]" for their self-titled full-length and somehow managed to recruit Offerman for the Ryan Baxley-directed video, which was unleashed 2 Fridays ago. Sounds like the Parks & Rec actor (Ron Swanson) is a family friend of Max & Elvis Kuehn's dad, Greg, a founding member of Long Beach Punk legends T.S.O.L.: "[Greg]'s played music for a long time with Nick's wife Megan Mullally -- she does music when she's not acting. Nick would do these comedy shows every now and then, and play music -- Elvis played with him a few times. Elvis played him some stuff, and we always were hinting, "Oh man, it would be awesome if you did a FIDLAR video!""

FIDLAR - Cocaine (ft. Nick Offerman) from FIDLAR

While it's still pretty NSFW, Schwartzel re-affirms what I kinda already assumed... Nick Offerman used a $2,000 prosthetic penis for the "Cocaine" video shoot (cause no one really has THAT much accuracy and control!). Here, "Ron Swanson" plays an average Joe who abruptly gets fired via text, buys a few 40's of Mickey's, and proceeds to go ape-shit across Los Angeles. FIDLAR are nowhere to be found, which is probably a good thing because Nick Offerman feverishly pisses on everything from Nicolas Cage's Hollywood Star to terribly unsuspecting passers-by. FIDLAR are planning to re-release "Awkward," an older track that previously featured UK songstress Kate Nash, on Wichita Recordings this upcoming Thursday, September 8th.

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"Let Me Shine for You:" Lindsay Lohan for Playboy (Winter 2011-12 Leak)

Lindsay Lohan essentially embodies exactly "What NOT to Do In Hollywood :" Fame, fortune, success... sex, drugs & Rock "N" Roll . Within a fairly short period of time, Lohan somehow managed to obtain a plentiful helping of POWER @ a very young age. This gradual rise-downfall was captured on film; Between 1998-2010, she portrayed a wide array of roles across the silver screen in movies including: Mean Girls, Bobby , Herbie Fully Loaded , Georgia Rule, Machete , and Freaky Friday . Between rapid-paced film shoots, Lindsay Lohan also found time to record 2 Pop Rock albums for Casablanca , Speak (2004) and A Litter More Personal-Raw (2005). Needless to say, Lindsay Lohan has gotten roped up in a lot of troubles and woes with the law over the last 3-5 years... a vicious cycle of drugs, arrest, court, rehab, "daddy issues," jail time [Repeat]. That's the pure basics of it - But Google that shit for additional info, if necessary. Towards the end of...

Jet Planes, Islands, Tigers On a Gold Leash: Lorde - "Royals" (The Weeknd Remixo)

I think it's pretty safe to say that The Weeknd (Abel Tesfaye) comfortably teeters the fine line between glitched-out smooth New Age R&B and hard-hitting Hip-Hop ; while the same could arguably be said for 16-year-old New Zealand new-comer, Lorde . Her break-out single "Royals" 1/2 jokingly shouts out semi-common bravado-worthy shit like: diamonds, "gold teeth, Grey Goose ... Cadillacs, Cristal, Maybach ... jet planes, islands, [and] tigers on a gold leash." But now, the Lorde/Weeknd connection has been further solidified, as Tesfaye recently managed to conjure up and release his own "Royals" remix. My beautiful girlfriend said earlier, and I paraphrase, that it "makes her wanna dance lol and she could [likely] hear this remix in a future movie!" Following the wide-spread release of her first 2 EP's (Love Club & Tennis Court) , Universal Republic plans to unleash Lorde 's proper debut album, Pure Heroine between ...

Pop Artist & Surfer Chronicle Intriguing Ex-Pornstar In "SASHA GREY."

Seemingly made to co-exist as thought-provoking companion pieces... "LINDSAY LOHAN" directors Richard Phillips & Taylor Steele are back with their most recent Art Presentation, "SASHA GREY." The 90-second short film was shot in early May @ John Lautner Chemosphere House in Los Angeles, CA. Both striking flicks will be shown on a giant floating video screen [ "Commercial Break" ] @ Garage Center for Contemporary Culture in Venice, Italy (June 1-5). "Adult acting chops" aside, Sasha (23) seems very intelligent, captivating, free-spirited, business savvy, well-mannered, charming... and dare I say, "average." And I really think that's exactly what Phillips/Steele were trying to convey throughout the course of the piece; Grey's beauty, public draw, sheer likeability, and honesty will surely take her very far in future endeavors... Solidifying her [updated] image as a true "Pop Culture Figure." * Featured soundtra...

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