Tom Gould Presents: Action Bronson & Party Supplies - "Easy Rider" (VICE/Atlantic Records)

"ACTiON BRONSON JUST JUMPED TO THE TOP OF THE RAP GAME FOOD CHAiN WiTH THiS MOViE-QUALiTY ViDEO, "EASY RiDER" FT SLASH," Tweeted oddball rapper and supposed Galaxy Gladiators collaborator, @JODYHiGHROLLER aka RiFF RAFF. "DON'T LET ME DIIIEEEE!!!" Action Bronson proclaims in a black-and-white red bandana-accented clip whilst pummeling bullets out of a machine gun, which appears to be a war flashback; as "Easy Rider"'s hymn-like intro starts, we see our bed-ridden hero approached by a lieutenant, "Soldier, tell me what happened..." to which Action Bronson achingly grunts, "Where's my guitaarrr!!?" It's largely unclear what happens next, but we see Bronson, still in a hospital gown, and his red bandana speeding down a barren desert highway as "EASY RIDER" and "DIRECTED BY TOM GOULD" scroll across the trailer-esque screen. RiFF RAFF is generally non-sensical, but he's 100% right, what you're currently witnessing is so much more than just your average music video... it's a cinematic short film that just happens to be accented by a top-notch guitar-drenched Hip-Hop track, to which Action Bronson has already achieved Michael Jackson "Thriller" levels of excellence. But let's quickly address those first couple introductory lines: "Praise the lord, I was born to drive boat / Feeling like Slash in front of the chapel / I'm leaned back with the Les Paul." Bronson is quite obviously referencing Guns 'N Roses' infamous power ballad "November Rain" video, and maybe even his own similarly-titled cast-off track, wherein Slash is just shreddin' in front of Axl Rose's stark white wedding chapel, which (spoiler alert) is later unintentionally hilariously emulated towards the end of "Easy Rider."

Action Bronson then picks up a woman who he somewhat inappropriately refers to as "a midget Puerto Rican at [his] beckon call" and then they "took acid for 10 days straight up in the mountains." I'm guessing he's a Vietnam vet with self-proclaimed "very loose pants" and man, he must have some serious PTSD, cause all sorts of illegal drugs and mysterious Native American smokes are repeatedly misused; Bronson seriously needs one of those "How's my driving?" bumper stickers because he's trippin' balls on his motorcycle all over those desert roads and it's not long before he gets into a bloody bar fight. Now, the second half of "Easy Rider" concludes with a drug-aided cop chase, another run-in with that friendly Native American chief, and of course, some Slash-indebted shirtless/trench coat shreddin' alongside a white chapel. As @atrak preemptively proclaimed late last night, "GIVE @ACTIONBRONSON A G**DAMN VMA FOR THIS "EASY RIDER" VIDEO, SWEET BABY JESUS;" Action Bronson's long-awaited major label debut, Mr. Wonderful still lacks a proper release date, but should be out on VICE/Atlantic Records before year's end or in early 2015. "The album is sounding incredible. The whole album is a stand-out. I don-t care about individual songs, I'm trying to make a complete, classic project. I just do my music uninfluenced by anybody else, or current trends, and it comes together at the end. Nothing needs to have a f*cking theme all the time. This is just rap. I'm not trying to make people think I'm some sort of scientific wizard or inspirational poet. F*ck that! It's just happy, funny, rugged, rough rap," as Action Bronson previously described Mr. Wonderful to NME back in May. This is gonna be one wild ride and I'm already calling it, Best Album EVER!!!

"Let Me Shine for You:" Lindsay Lohan for Playboy (Winter 2011-12 Leak)

Lindsay Lohan essentially embodies exactly "What NOT to Do In Hollywood :" Fame, fortune, success... sex, drugs & Rock "N" Roll . Within a fairly short period of time, Lohan somehow managed to obtain a plentiful helping of POWER @ a very young age. This gradual rise-downfall was captured on film; Between 1998-2010, she portrayed a wide array of roles across the silver screen in movies including: Mean Girls, Bobby , Herbie Fully Loaded , Georgia Rule, Machete , and Freaky Friday . Between rapid-paced film shoots, Lindsay Lohan also found time to record 2 Pop Rock albums for Casablanca , Speak (2004) and A Litter More Personal-Raw (2005). Needless to say, Lindsay Lohan has gotten roped up in a lot of troubles and woes with the law over the last 3-5 years... a vicious cycle of drugs, arrest, court, rehab, "daddy issues," jail time [Repeat]. That's the pure basics of it - But Google that shit for additional info, if necessary. Towards the end of

[W]reckless, Topless American Youth: Lana del Rey - "Born 2 Die" (Britney Spears Birthday 30)

Lana del Rey [Lizzy Grant] effectively became 2011's "It Girl" with the release of her phenomenal debut single, "Video Games" (Stranger) . Like many struggling singer-songwriters, Grant has been signed, dropped, and significantly changed her public image since bursting onto the scene (2009). With that said, it can be assumed that Lana del Rey has collected just as many "haters" as she has avid supporters. To be perfectly honest, the only other artist I can think of that made this much commotion... garnered so much wide-spread buzz/hate and critical acclaim -- right out of the gates -- with just one track is Britney Spears . And maybe in this post- Mike musical era, that's the true synthesis of Pop Culture: Britney Lynn Spears . After months of repeated teasing and speculation, Lana del Rey 's major label debut, Born 2 Die will [finally] be released this coming Jan. 30-31, 2012. Pitchfork reports that it will feature "Off to The Ra

Liberty Bell Cracked In 1/2: Ween - "Freedom of '76" (Gene Ween's Final Send-Off)

Chocolate & Cheese (1994) was one of the first albums I bought with my own money. I was in some sort of BMG Music Club , where you'd buy 5 CD's and then get 10 for "FREE." It was all sent through mail order and you picked the titles from some special booklet. I'm almost positive that Chocolate & Cheese's side boob-baring album cover was what initially drew me in... mind you, I was 12-15 and the zany Ween logo/middle finger CD graphic really didn't hurt either. Honestly, I forget how I really felt about it @ the time, but a few years later, my older cousin Josh told me that Ween were this BIG college "jam band." CKY did some sort pf 93.3 radio takeover to promote their new album and played "Freedom of '76" late that night on air. Needless to say, I re-visited Chocolate & Cheese @ about 20-something this go 'round and I fucking loved it! Ween were really weird, yet talented... almost too talented. I can vaguel

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