DJ Cummerbund Pens Yet Another Chapter In The Ever-evolving Saga of Rhonda Garbonzo: Flo Rida, T-Pain & Motörhead-assisted "Boots (with The Fur)"

Here, ladies and germs, we have the next audio/visual chapter in the ever-evolving saga of Rhonda Garbanzo: Flo Rida, T-Pain & Motörhead-borrowing "Boots (with The Fur.)" Lest we forget, the last time we heard from our beloved strong female protagonist was within DJ Cummerbund's Foo Fighters-approved "Freaktender;" an expertly-executed mash-up artfully blending Foo Fighters' "The Pretender," Rick James' 1981 Disco-Funk smash hit "Super Freak," The Beach Boys' "Help Me, Rhonda," and Led Zeppelin, for good measure. Since "Freaktender" and prior to the infectious Urban R&B and Heavy Metal-blending concoction that is "Boots (with The Fur,)" DJ Cummerbund has unleashed Evanescence & Celine Dion-juxtaposing "Bring Me My Heart," Nickelback, Sixpence None The Richer, Ying Yang Twins, Dragonforce, and Lil Jon-featuring "FreckleFeet" (the sequel to "PantsFeet,") Blind Melon and Twisted Sister-assisted "No Take It," and Rihanna, Gorillaz, and Metallica-mashing "That Which I Desire."

While I've been admittedly dragging my feet a bit for the past 2-3 weeks since "Boots (with The Fur,)" the ever-prolific DJ Cummerbund has somehow released not one... not two... not three, but four newly-minted mash-up chapters to Rhonda Garbanzo's story: "The Sound of Smash Mouth" (Karaoke Version 노래방 버전,) "Came In Through The Window," "Imagine There's No Yoo-Hoo," and Shia LaBeouf-starring "Thick Skin," uploaded just a few mere hours ago. Did anyone follow absolutely ANY of that? Regardless, or not withstanding, I'll let DJ Cummerbund himself take it from here; below, is an emailed statement on "Boots (with The Fur,)" which I received from Mr. Cummerbund's manager and "handler" J. Gary Gildersleeve. I've been told by Gildersleeve that DJ Cummerbund is currently hard at work on an EP's-worth of original material, which he was only able to describe as, "interesting... so far!" So, do yourself a favor this weekend and peruse through the fun-loving audio/visual saga of Rhonda Garbanzo and don't forget to subscribe to DJ Cummerbund's YouTube channel. You surely won't regret it!

"Hello again, Matthew. I just released a new mash-up, which is another chapter in the long saga of Rhonda Garbanzo and serves the purpose of emphasizing her penchant for a sinful lifestyle and desire to be the center of attention. I chose Motörhead's "Ace of Spades" and Flo Rida's "Low" because they are both in Eb minor and as you know, Eb minor has 6 flats... 6x111 = 666... The Number of The Beast! Fans will also recall Beethoven's use of Eb minor to the introduction in the last movement of his "Septet Op. 20," which I heavily borrowed from for this particular work. I also included footage of the band Motörhead as LEGO's because I like LEGO's. Speaking of fans... I just have to say, after a string of unfortunate incidents, I would like to request privacy when I'm out in public with my family. The other day, I was having brunch in the village when two children... they had to be about 10-years-old... just walked right up to my table and started blathering on about how much they love my work and how I'm their hero, etc. I immediately jumped up and started screaming at them to leave me alone and they start making a scene by weeping loudly. This COMPLETELY ruined my very nice, quiet meal and I am just SICK of these things happening all of the time. PLEASE leave me alone when I am having brunch. Twaddle!"

- DJ Cummerbund (by way of J. Gary Gildersleeve)

"Let Me Shine for You:" Lindsay Lohan for Playboy (Winter 2011-12 Leak)

Lindsay Lohan essentially embodies exactly "What NOT to Do In Hollywood :" Fame, fortune, success... sex, drugs & Rock "N" Roll . Within a fairly short period of time, Lohan somehow managed to obtain a plentiful helping of POWER @ a very young age. This gradual rise-downfall was captured on film; Between 1998-2010, she portrayed a wide array of roles across the silver screen in movies including: Mean Girls, Bobby , Herbie Fully Loaded , Georgia Rule, Machete , and Freaky Friday . Between rapid-paced film shoots, Lindsay Lohan also found time to record 2 Pop Rock albums for Casablanca , Speak (2004) and A Litter More Personal-Raw (2005). Needless to say, Lindsay Lohan has gotten roped up in a lot of troubles and woes with the law over the last 3-5 years... a vicious cycle of drugs, arrest, court, rehab, "daddy issues," jail time [Repeat]. That's the pure basics of it - But Google that shit for additional info, if necessary. Towards the end of

[W]reckless, Topless American Youth: Lana del Rey - "Born 2 Die" (Britney Spears Birthday 30)

Lana del Rey [Lizzy Grant] effectively became 2011's "It Girl" with the release of her phenomenal debut single, "Video Games" (Stranger) . Like many struggling singer-songwriters, Grant has been signed, dropped, and significantly changed her public image since bursting onto the scene (2009). With that said, it can be assumed that Lana del Rey has collected just as many "haters" as she has avid supporters. To be perfectly honest, the only other artist I can think of that made this much commotion... garnered so much wide-spread buzz/hate and critical acclaim -- right out of the gates -- with just one track is Britney Spears . And maybe in this post- Mike musical era, that's the true synthesis of Pop Culture: Britney Lynn Spears . After months of repeated teasing and speculation, Lana del Rey 's major label debut, Born 2 Die will [finally] be released this coming Jan. 30-31, 2012. Pitchfork reports that it will feature "Off to The Ra

Liberty Bell Cracked In 1/2: Ween - "Freedom of '76" (Gene Ween's Final Send-Off)

Chocolate & Cheese (1994) was one of the first albums I bought with my own money. I was in some sort of BMG Music Club , where you'd buy 5 CD's and then get 10 for "FREE." It was all sent through mail order and you picked the titles from some special booklet. I'm almost positive that Chocolate & Cheese's side boob-baring album cover was what initially drew me in... mind you, I was 12-15 and the zany Ween logo/middle finger CD graphic really didn't hurt either. Honestly, I forget how I really felt about it @ the time, but a few years later, my older cousin Josh told me that Ween were this BIG college "jam band." CKY did some sort pf 93.3 radio takeover to promote their new album and played "Freedom of '76" late that night on air. Needless to say, I re-visited Chocolate & Cheese @ about 20-something this go 'round and I fucking loved it! Ween were really weird, yet talented... almost too talented. I can vaguel

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