St. Valentine's Day Massacre: Pissed Jeans - "Bathroom Laughter" (Bloody Info-mercial)

Roughly 10 years and 4 albums deep into their career now, "Bathroom Laughter" is only Pissed Jeans' third music video!; Not too far behind behind Thrash Jams like "False Jesii, Part 2" and "I've Still Got You (Ice Cream)" (2007-09). Matt Korvette, Brad Fry, Randy Huth, and Sean McGuiness unleashed Honeys, which was recorded @ Milkboy Studios (Philly) with producer Alex Newport, on Sub Pop this past Tuesday, Feb. 12th. For you un-familiar slackers, Pissed Jeans kinda sounds like late 80's experimental Black Flag, complete with fuzzed out guitar licks and 1/2 sung-shouted vocal fragments. It's director Joe Stakun's demented riff a late night knife set-selling info-mercial gone terribly wrong, which somehow morphs into a bloody rotten mess!

We're talkin' about VMA-worthy performances from Mark Proksch (The Office), nerdy My Life As Liz [Lee] dame, up-and-coming actress Leigh Myles, and Philly wrestler Dragonfly. Frontman Matt Korvette plays a dimwitted weatherman and his fellow Pissed Jeans bandmates appear throughout, too; The band fielded fan-submitted YouTube commenter questions from 12-12:30 ET Tuesday afternoon and after a few near misses, I finally got a "I would love to do a one-on-one interview for your [AWESOME] blog, The Witzard. See you Friday!!!!" response from Korvette. After a few early listens, Honeys, an album about the life & times of an aging Punk Rocker/Middle American, is actually pretty damn sweet and genuinely relate-able. Pissed Jeans are currently wreaking havoc across the nation... starting with a hometown Honeys record release show @ Underground Arts Friday followed by 9 scattered dates, running from April 12-20th.

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"Let Me Shine for You:" Lindsay Lohan for Playboy (Winter 2011-12 Leak)

Lindsay Lohan essentially embodies exactly "What NOT to Do In Hollywood :" Fame, fortune, success... sex, drugs & Rock "N" Roll . Within a fairly short period of time, Lohan somehow managed to obtain a plentiful helping of POWER @ a very young age. This gradual rise-downfall was captured on film; Between 1998-2010, she portrayed a wide array of roles across the silver screen in movies including: Mean Girls, Bobby , Herbie Fully Loaded , Georgia Rule, Machete , and Freaky Friday . Between rapid-paced film shoots, Lindsay Lohan also found time to record 2 Pop Rock albums for Casablanca , Speak (2004) and A Litter More Personal-Raw (2005). Needless to say, Lindsay Lohan has gotten roped up in a lot of troubles and woes with the law over the last 3-5 years... a vicious cycle of drugs, arrest, court, rehab, "daddy issues," jail time [Repeat]. That's the pure basics of it - But Google that shit for additional info, if necessary. Towards the end of...

Jet Planes, Islands, Tigers On a Gold Leash: Lorde - "Royals" (The Weeknd Remixo)

I think it's pretty safe to say that The Weeknd (Abel Tesfaye) comfortably teeters the fine line between glitched-out smooth New Age R&B and hard-hitting Hip-Hop ; while the same could arguably be said for 16-year-old New Zealand new-comer, Lorde . Her break-out single "Royals" 1/2 jokingly shouts out semi-common bravado-worthy shit like: diamonds, "gold teeth, Grey Goose ... Cadillacs, Cristal, Maybach ... jet planes, islands, [and] tigers on a gold leash." But now, the Lorde/Weeknd connection has been further solidified, as Tesfaye recently managed to conjure up and release his own "Royals" remix. My beautiful girlfriend said earlier, and I paraphrase, that it "makes her wanna dance lol and she could [likely] hear this remix in a future movie!" Following the wide-spread release of her first 2 EP's (Love Club & Tennis Court) , Universal Republic plans to unleash Lorde 's proper debut album, Pure Heroine between ...

Pop Artist & Surfer Chronicle Intriguing Ex-Pornstar In "SASHA GREY."

Seemingly made to co-exist as thought-provoking companion pieces... "LINDSAY LOHAN" directors Richard Phillips & Taylor Steele are back with their most recent Art Presentation, "SASHA GREY." The 90-second short film was shot in early May @ John Lautner Chemosphere House in Los Angeles, CA. Both striking flicks will be shown on a giant floating video screen [ "Commercial Break" ] @ Garage Center for Contemporary Culture in Venice, Italy (June 1-5). "Adult acting chops" aside, Sasha (23) seems very intelligent, captivating, free-spirited, business savvy, well-mannered, charming... and dare I say, "average." And I really think that's exactly what Phillips/Steele were trying to convey throughout the course of the piece; Grey's beauty, public draw, sheer likeability, and honesty will surely take her very far in future endeavors... Solidifying her [updated] image as a true "Pop Culture Figure." * Featured soundtra...

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