The Witzard

"Just in from the department of unexpectedness, Banks (no, not Lloyd ) has upped a mixtape and it's called EVERYBODY ON MY D*CK LIKE THEY SUPPOSED TO BE . Actually, we kinda knew this was happening. Paul [Banks] sent over a rough mixtape about nine months ago of his beats and production and it was genius. And what, with all the Kendricks and the A$APs and whatever, we thought a mixtape would take Banks to new heights if we got it out months before release... In this case, Paul called in a some mega-favors and got features from El-P , Talib [Kweli], Mike G , and hold up, HIGH PRIZM (né High Priest )," reads Matablog's tongue-in-cheek press release published accompanying Interpol frontman Paul Banks' surprisingly great 2013 "mixtape," Everybody On My D*ck Like They Supposed to Be . It would appear as though around the same general time frame, Banks miraculously managed to link up with avid chess player and Wu-Tang Clan founding member RZA ;...

"Ladies and gentlemen, check this out... a spectacular event in rhymin'. It might seem insane, but the Big Daddy Kane is rockin' in the house with Paul Simon ... and my man Biz Mark down in the park. Even Spud Webb plays a cool part... in the video, "Me and Julio Down By The Schoolyard,'" Big Daddy Kane effortlessly raps over a stuttering beat provided by human-beatbox, Biz Markie . While it may seem like a fairly odd pairing at first, Simon, Kane, and Biz were actually all label-mates at Warner Bros. Records at the time of "Me and Julio Down By The Schoolyard"' s 1988 Negotiations and Love Songs re-release. Not entirely unlike Simon's Lorne Michaels -concieved "You Can Call Me Al," which co-starred then SNL cast member Chevy Chase just two years earlier, "Julio" boasts a staggering amount of star-power, in its own right: hit-making rappers Big Daddy Kane & Biz Markie , former NBA point guard Spud Webb , ...

"It's still hard to believe I found an out-take [with] my original band @CHICorg #IllBeThere ," @nilerodgers exuberantly Tweeted late Saturday night; Rodgers, who's essentially the sole founding member of Disco-Funk originators, Chic (now, somewhat confusingly billed as "CHIC featuring Nile Rodgers" ), has been pain-stakingly compiling a collection of recently unearthed 1970-80's era Chic tracks along with contemporary producers like Avicii , David Guetta, and The Martinez Brothers . Chic 's newly-surfaced material, tentatively titled It's About Time , seems to have been oddly enough reverse "influenced" by modern-day Disco-Funk acts like Chromeo , Dâm-Funk, Tuxedo , Mark Ronson & The Dap-Kings, and even quite ironically, buddies Daft Punk & Pharrell , who were all very likely initially influenced by Chic 's genre-shaping output in the first place. " ["I'll Be There"] is a moving concept for me abo...

I'll be the first to readily admit that former Rilo Kiley frontwoman Jenny Lewis' latest Beck -produced single, "Just One of The Guys" isn't exactly your typical hyper-aggressive/ Boom-Bap fan-fare here at The Witzard . But regardless, you really can't deny the inherent cuteness behind Anne Hathaway, Kristen Stewart , and relative new-comer Brie Larson (21 Jump Street) acting as part of Lewis' faux all-female backing band. For those not familiar with Rilo Kiley , Jenny Lewis' past solo work, or her guest appearances alongside The Postal Service and Bright Eyes , I'd almost sonically equate "Just One of The Guys" to Hole 's 90's-early 2000's lighter side or for lack of a better term, Soft Chick Rock . I'm not entirely sure if Jenny Lewis was in charge of the ladies' "business casual" white and rainbow accented pant-suits, but she definitely self-directed it's colorful video... which oddly enough,...

Action Bronson is currently hard at work recording his long-awaited major label debut for VICE Records , which is only a fragmented section of a huge multi-media company that's presently involved in world news, music, fashion, network TV, and now foodie culture. The offspring of an Albanian immigrant and Jewish New Yorker , Bronson was a former New York -area gourmet chef before he started rapping just about six years ago. Now, Action Bronson has teamed back up with newly-formed VICE MUNCHIES for what's poised to be a quasi-follow-up to their ill-fated series, VICE Eats ; F*ck, That's Delicious will debut online this May and intends to "capture Action's culinary adventures on his on-going world tour." MUNCHIES uploaded an all-too-brief trailer early Monday morning and judging by said trailer, episode 1 will likely highlight dining spots he discovered while on Eminem 's recent Rapture Tour through New Zealand , Australia, and South Africa . While it...

Right on the heels of his long-awaited, nearly 2 years in-the-making Party Supplies -produced mixtape, Blue Chips 2 (November 1st), Action Bronson has teamed up with VICE Records' sister site, Noisey for VICE Eats ; a hyper-realistic weekly web-series "where [they'll] travel the world with Action Bronson and his motley crew of associates to check out the finest dives and dimes of the restaurant scene." Lest we forget, Bronson was a former Art Institute of New York -trained chef, who quite regularly seasons his dense wordplay with a dash of Food Network -friendly speak. Most likely commissioned by Warner Bros. VICE ultimately sets out to follow "Action and his rotating cast of dinner companions [while they] dine in a wide range of remarkable spots to give us their honest opinions - both on and off the plate." It was seemingly preceded by 2 far lesser-known VICE Eats micro-segments, dating back to this past August or early September. The inaugu...

"IN CASE [YOU] MISSED IT EARLIER, "THE TURNING POINT PERFORMANCE OF MY CAREER,"" Action "Bam Bam" Bronson ecstatically, 1/2-jokingly Tweeted late Wednesday afternoon; He's in fact referring to a recent pseudo-concert at Saint Hilda's , a local old folks home which Noisey UK has established some sort of relationship with and "arranged a surprise visit from the hottest rapper on the planet." While most recording artists get pretty stoked when the opportunity arises to play Madison Square Garden , Wembley Stadium, Red Rocks , etc. Bronson has a reputation for throwing mildly outrageous, slightly left-of-center concert experiences. It seems like he'll gladly play just about anywhere for a decent price... Tweeting "THIS IS BY FAR, MY MOST ELECTRIFYING PERFORMANCE OF MY CAREER!!!!!!" not long after performing "Strictly 4 My Jeeps" for the confused seniors. While the majority of Saint Hilda's old-timers d...

It seems like Action Bronson & Harry Fraud have a pretty size-able batch of freeze-dried SAAAB STORIES left-overs, since "Water Sports" is the second track that's been leaked since the mixtape EP's June 11th release; Between "Strictly 4 My Jeeps" (Remix) , "Heel Toe," and "Water Sports," we now have 3 appended SAAAB STORIES bonus tracks! Premiered over at Village Voice , "Water Sports" [in]appropriately features washed up (fictional) baseball player Kenny Powers on his jet-ski, fully clothed for whatever reason. I was lucky enough to experience Bronson performing choice cuts from SAAAB STORIES earlier this summer, a meticulously-assembled 7-track EP, which he says upon it's creation, "I was 100% thinking about it being a performance project... [almost] everything on there has a hook, and knocks... it's thumping. The stage is rattling, everyone's going wild" (The Green Room) ! Long-awaited Par...

Right off the bat, "Dark Water" vaguely reminds me of "Strawberry Fields Forever"' s droning Psych-Rock wail mixed with a strong 90's Weezer Pop sensibility and a Funky , white boy Dance -able groove. Dale Earnhardt Jr. Jr. unleashed their latest release, Patterns EP last month on Record Store Day (April 20th) and now, it's conveniently available on iTunes for just $3.99. Joshua Epstein & Daniel Zott are 2 like-minded, working class Motor City natives whose Facebook Biography blatantly suggests, "The idea being, that if one can accept a band being named Dale Earnhardt Jr. Jr. , then you've already opened yourself up to listening to anything the band can come up with. You've already decided to leave expectations behind." For all intensive purposes, if you don't count newly-added members Mike Higgins (drums) and Jon Visger (keys), I don't think it'd be TOTALLY unreasonable to sonically compare Dale Earnhardt...

"Tuxedo Funk EP," a mysterious 3-track quick-strike EP was quietly uploaded online about a week ago. It's been slowly picking up steam across The Blogosphere and I finally gave it a listen late Monday night, too. Blue-Eyed Soul crooner Mayer Hawthorne is quite obviously the man handling vocal duties over top of what's rumored to be smooth production work from either Jake-One, RAC , or Dâm-Funk . The unique blend of Soul-Funk , Doo-Wop, Hip-Hop , and EDM ends up sounding something like Bruno Mars meets Daft Punk [or just Chromeo ] ha. Supposedly cloaked in secrecy due to label-binding contracts, I'm sure Tuxedo 's true identities will be revealed eventually; But regardless, there's more Funk housed in these 3 tracks than on Red Hot Chili Pepper's failed 3-album opus, Stadium Arcadium (2006). "Do It" is hands down, my personal favourite track, after a few early listens. Tuxedo Funk 's opener is nearly 4:15 of blazin' Disco-...