The Witzard

"There are milk crates downstairs, if you need to use one MT @justintimberlake Join me & @Target tonight for just one song" aging Indie Rockers Yo La Tengo snarkily Tweeted Wednesday night. For what it's worth, a global super-star like Timberlake really does have ABSOLUTELY NO business playing a one-off corporate-sponsored show at a shitty hole-in-the-wall [albeit closed] NJ Indie Rock venue like Maxwell's ; Justin Timberlake was actually filming an Instagram & Twitter -fied Target commercial for a select 150 lucky fans, which is coincidentally set to dual as a promo for his new clothing line and a secondary "Take Back The Night" music video. Not even 24 hours later, Jay Z and new-found buddy Timberlake unleashed their Anthony Mandler -directed "Holy Grail" visuals, via Facebook . The exclusively-released clip could've very well reached nearly 42 million combined "Friends" by now, which has only recently been re-u...

Now that his long-delayed Fool's Gold debut, OLD , finally has a proper release date (Sept. 30th), Danny Brown has unleashed it's Dirt McGirt -referencing lead video-single, "ODB." The self-proclaimed "dirty old man with a pill in his mouth and his dick in his hand" skillfully recruited frequent collaborator Paul White and [director] RUFFMERCY for "ODB," as well as A$AP Rocky , Purity Ring, Charli XCX , Freddie Gibbs, ScHoolboy Q , Rustie, A-Trak , and SKYWLKR, who also contributed to OLD 's currently unspecified tracklist. Let's just fuggedabout Kendrick Lamar 's recent #rapgame-rattling verse on Big Sean left-over "Control," Danny Brown easily out-raps and most likely terribly embarrasses nearly 3/4's of Hip-Hop 's so-called "top emcees," usually over jittery almost un-rappable Electro-Trap beats. Danny Brown and his genre-blending buddies Action Bronson & Trash Talk are soon headed out o...

"Guess who's REALLY back? #VMAs ," Eminem Tweeted along with a KAWS -designed logo before the start of the 30th annual MTV VMA's ; while " Miley Cyrus was still TWERKIN,'" Justin Timberlake reunited with N'SYNC , Kanye performed under a lynching tree, Lady GaGa showed off her new-found fat ass, and Katy Perry closed out the show from a boxing ring/stage under the Brooklyn Bridge ... Eminem revealed news that he's prepping The Marshall Mathers LP 2 for a November 5th release (Shady Aftermath) . Eager and unknowing fans were treated to 2 Beats By Dre/Eminem commercials throughout the live broadcast, 15 and 30-second teasers between 9-11pm. Included within the #NewBeatsStudio commercials was a track preview presumably titled, "Berzerk," which is set for a wide release this upcoming Tuesday, August 27th. It seems as though Eminem has resurrected his angst-filled bleach blonde Slim Shady alter-ego, who's been largely in...

Whether or not it's actually factual, Tyler, The Creator Tweeted: "LISTENING TO LIL B WITH KING KRULE . GAY HUMOR WITH EMINEM . "HOE CAKES" BY MF DOOM LIVE. ALL IN LIKE 72 HOURS. MY LIFE IS SO NASTY!" Saturday evening. It's also worth noting that Odd Future 's semi-mysterious feliciathegoat Instagram handle posted a candid shot of Tyler, Earl & King Krule along with the caption, "OUT GETTING RIBS. GO GET KRULE'S NEW ALBUM, [6 Feet Beneath The Moon] ." 19-year-old King Krule 's just-released album definitely seems to have Tyler, The Creator 's approval; Archy Marshall 's debut album under the "King Krule" moniker was quietly unleashed on his birthday, August 24th, although he's released various projects under a few different now-retired monikers... Zoo Kid , Edgar The Beatmaker, and DJ JD Sports . True Panther/XL Recordings unveiled 2 teaser singles earlier this month, "Easy, Easy" and ...

Legendary Hardcore Art-Punk band The Dismemberment Plan had their original "reign of terror" across DC from 1993-2003, eventually parted ways, and all got boring blue collar desk jobs. Since initially re-forming in Sept. 2010, D-Plan have played a handful of scattered and wildly successful reunion tours (including a Late Night gig). After years of one-off gigs and claims of not getting back together "except to drink beer," it seems like Travis Morrison , Eric Axelson, Jason Caddell & Joe Easley are finally back together and in full form for the foreseeable future. But The Dismemberment Plan 's comeback single, "Waiting," was released in a pretty unconventional method. It was temporarily play-able when eager fans dialed 252-64-DPLAN , although "Waiting" has since been re-released via Soundcloud . Now, the band have unleashed a second taste of their forthcoming Uncanney Valley album, "Invisible," which Tom Breihan ...

While it's title could easily be a reference to Toni Braxton 's similarly-titled 1996 smash-hit, M.I.A. 's latest [controlled] leak, "UNBREAK My Mixtape" almost seamlessly samples Blur , Carly Simon, Karen Dalton , and Fresh 4 in just under 5 minutes! After nearly a year of 2's-worth of delays and a single threatening Tweet , M.I.A. 's long-awaited fourth studio album Matangi is finally slated for a firm November 5th release. "UNBREAK My Mixtape" might just be The Internet 's fifth taste of Matangi , succeeded by "Only 1 U," "Come Walk with Me," "atTENTion," and possibly even "Bad Girls" (2012). M.I.A. effortlessly floats in-between the rapidly-changing beat(s); lamenting about a lost love and a broken mixtape, "Here's a mixtape that I made, let's take a break... While I get my life sorted, here's a mixtape... What did I do for you to call me crazy?" M.I.A. seems pretty ...

While Terry Crews has lent his broad-spanning acting talents to everything from The Expendables 1-2 to a recent Old Spice campaign, I think I personally enjoyed his portrayal of a teen-aged Chris Rock 's relentlessly hard-working father on Everybody Hates Chris (2005-09) the best. Major Lazer , the lone robo-soldier of the zombie apocalypse and the brainchild of one Thomas Wesley "Diplo" Pentz , has been long-overdue for a righteous live-action mini-movie adaption. Crews stars alongside a very colorful cast of characters: Lauren London , Blake Anderson, Nick Kroll , and a menacing super-villain named General Rubbish. During his premier performance as Major Lazer , Terry Crews inflicts plenty of bloodshed, campy action, gun-arm violence, and general AWESOMENESS under Brandon Dermer 's direction. Now, the actual track showcased in the music video, "Scare Me" features Peaches & Timberlee and appears on Diplo 's second album released under his ...