Tuesday, June 16, 2020

Guts of The Ice - An Exploration of "Puck" Rock/Hockey-core #17: The Hockey Monkey vs. Light The Lamp (The Witzard Interview)


For this week's installment of Guts of The Ice, we decided to do something a bit different: have THE ZAMBONIS' mascot, The Hockey Monkey, interview Eddie Crossczyk, Slewfoot Foose, Mark Wrecky, Donny Brook & Andhe Scores from Light The Lamp! Light The Lamp (LTL) recently released three music videos from their debut EP, TILLY TIME: "Bring Back The Whale" & "Playoff Beard" remotely-recorded from Quarantine and "2 Minutes." If interested, you can read our previous Guts of The Ice interviews with both The Hockey Monkey AND Light The Lamp right here. Anyways, take it away, Hockey Monkey...

"I watched and enjoyed the videos! The first one, "Bring Back The Whalers," would be a perfect match for a split single with THE ZAMBONIS. We, also, have a song about losing The Whalers (and other teams.) We could do it on Whalers Green vinyl! Also, love the footage of Pucky The Whale. Hence, my inspiration for the mascot question. The second video, "2 Minutes," starts with Mario Lemieux on a breakaway. Again, couldn't catch the name of the song. Love the start of the video! The NHL was so good in the 1990's. I am officially issuing a ZAMBONIS vs. Light The Lamp NHL '94 Sega Genesis challenge! There's no hockey, so this photo is a Hockey Monkey with no hockey; just drinking a coffee, reading a book, and doing some painting!"


- Matt Horowitz / The Hockey Monkey


01. The Hockey Monkey: Who are your Top 3 hockey fighters of all time?

Eddie Crossczyk: Bob Probert, Dave Schultz, Zac Rinaldo.

Slewfoot Foose: Bob Probert, P.J. Stock, Stan Jonathan.

Mark Wrecky: I'm going outside the box here: my favorite NHL fighter is Ryan Reaves. I love that guy! I [loved] him during his time with The Pens. I love his enthusiasm after he lays guys out. Like the time he taunted the entire Capitals Bench after a fight or when he blew kisses at The Dallas Bench. He's the man. My second favorite is Ryan Reaves as a Vegas Golden Knight and third is Reaves as a St. Louis Blues.

Donny Brook: Georges Laraque, Rick Tocchet, Jarome Iginla.

Andhe Scores: Bob Probert. Bobby Probert. Robert Probert.

02. H. Monkey: After Pucky The Whale (obviously, he/she is #1!) what are your Top 3 NHL mascots?

Crossczyk: Well, as a Flyers fan, obviously, I've gotta say Gritty. But if I weren't a Flyers fan? Man, I'd probably go with Gritty. But, if I absolutely HATED The Flyers? Oh, boy. Tough one. I guess, I'd have to say... Gritty.

Foose: Gritty, Gritty, and GRITTY.

Wrecky: Top mascot is easy. It's Gritty. Let me be clear, I hate The Flyers. But, holy smokes, I love Gritty. I don't know anyone that doesn't. He punched some little kid, man, which is the most "Philly" thing ever. After what could be the absolute worst first day on the job, Gritty rebounded quickly and became a fan favorite.

Brook: Gritty, Iceburgh, [NJ] Devil.

Scores: Even though I hate The Flyers, Gritty [is] cool. Sparky [The Sun Devil] & Harvey The Hound.


03. H. Monkey: What are your favorite NHL arena anthems?

Crossczyk: "Bro Hymn" by Pennywise, "The Orange & The Black" by The Boils, and "Walk" by Pantera.

Foose: Dropkick [Murphy's] "Time to Go" (only need one!) Although, "Brass Bonanza!" gets an Honorable Mention ha.

Wrecky: My favorite arena anthem is gonna be the first time one of our songs is played at The Giant Center. Imagine it: The Bears get dinged for some BS call. The classic "B-U-L-L-S-H-!-T" chant from The Hershey crowd and all [of] the sudden, you're hearing Donny wailing out our penalty smash hit, "2 MINUTES." The crowd's gonna go wild and so will I.

Donny Brook: Ramones - "Blitzkrieg Bop."

Scores: "American National Anthem," "Canadian National Anthem," and [Ozzy Osbourne's] "Crazy Train."

04. H. Monkey: Who has the best Philly cheesesteaks? How do you prefer to order your steak?

Crossczyk: Honestly, when I'm in Philly, I make it more of a point to get some gigantic slices from Lorenzo's. But when I DO get a cheesesteak, I want onions, BANANA peppers, green peppers, and provolone. Depending on how I'm feeling, maybe, some hot sauce, too.

Foose: I don't really have a fav place. I order a Wiz With... though.

Wrecky: This is a question that's gonna have as many answers as there are steak joints in Olde City. But this is easy... it's Sonny's in Olde City. I've tried a ton of Philly cheesesteaks, work takes me out East a lot so I hit as many of them up as I can. Sonny's steak isn't chopped quite as fine as other places. It's juuuust a little thicker. So good. Dalessandro's in Roxborough is really good. The best steak is highly debatable, [but] one thing is for certain, steer clear of the two major tourist traps at 9th & Passyunk.

Donny Brook: Jim's, Ishkibibble's, Steve Prince of Steaks. Provolone, no onions.

Scores: Campo's in Old City. I like The Flyers Ice Steak with cream cheese and jalapeño cheddar.


05. H. Monkey: What's the best summer drink: Banana Daiquiri or Piña Colada? (We know the correct answer...)

Crossczyk: I don't think I've ever had a Banana Daiquiri, but that sounds pretty good. However, I'd, honestly, say my favorite "big boy" summer drink is Leffe Blonde. It's a delicious Belgian beer. Expensive, but worth it.

Foose: Beer.

Wrecky: The best summer drink is an ice cold beer. Preferably, a super-hoppy IPA.

Donny Brook: Gin & Tonic.

Scores: Piña Colada.

06. H. Monkey: What have been your Top Quarantine vinyl purchases?

Crossczyk: Holy f**k, I haven't bought vinyl for YEARS. I'm too irresponsible to own that sh*t. I think, my "collection" consists of [The Misfits'] Earth AD, Shower with Goats' Just Another Day, a Lost Cause EP, an old Snacktime Records compilation with Rightstart, Stretch Armstrong, Step Ahead, Disciple & 24th Solution, and the soundtracks to The Godfather, Breakfast Club, and Spaceballs. I did buy plenty of sh*t during quarantine, though. A bunch of beard oil and balm from Royal Beardsmen, a Nintendo Switch for my kids (my wife plays it the most,) and, of course, our custom LTL sweaters!

Foose: Actually, not a vinyl guy. I did buy some '90-91 hockey card packs, though...

Wrecky: I'm not much of a vinyl guy, so I haven't purchased any during The Lockdown. Stuff I do have on vinyl, though: I've got a super-limited edition of The Misfits doing "Monster Mash" [on] clear green vinyl. I think, they only made 250 of them. I love that. I've, also, got Pennywise's first EP from the late 80's, along with Dead Kennedys' "Nazi Punks F**k Off" 7-inch.

Donny Brook: Tormentor - Anno Domini.

Scores: I don't own a record player, but the last music purchase [I made] was Alestorm - Curse of The Crystal Coconut.


07. H. Monkey: What was your last live show before "the world stopped?" Mine was Mr. Bungle in Brooklyn and it was epic!

Crossczyk: March 7th in Harrisburg. Skid Row Monthly Invasion at JB Lovedraft's. We played with Fat Heaven, Olde Tigers, Video Massacre, and Mob Mentality. It was a KILLER f**king show with a lot of our good friends there. MC (singer from Olde Tigers and owner of Skid Row Garage) always puts on the best shows and this was no exception.

Foose: Last show was one we played. Was stoked to see Mob Mentality & Fat Heaven. And it's ALWAYS a pleasure to see Olde Tigers. Twas a grand evening and fun was had by all!!! Thanks to JB Lovedraft's for having it and MC Hyser (Skid Row Garage) for setting it up!!!

Wrecky: Our last show before the world stopped was a banger at JB Lovedraft's in downtown Harrisburg on March 7. It was a ton of fun. Good crowd and we met a bunch of new friends. We'll be back at it again, hopefully, this summer and we can't wait.

Donny Brook: Morbid Angel, Watain & Incantation at Reverb in Reading.

Scores: Last show was LTL & Olde Tigers at JB LOVEDRAFT'S in early March. Had [two] tickets for Bad Religion in April and Megadeath/Lamb of God/Trivium/In Flames in June. Both were cancelled. Bummer.

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